To the Man Who Thought I Wouldn't Make It As a Pastor

To the man who thought I wouldn't make it as a pastor:

The only reason you and I were ever in contact with one another was because the polity of our church communicated to me that in order to progress toward answering the call God placed on my life is if I first talked with you about that call, to "get the ball rolling," so to speak.

I know that you invited my male peers to your office to listen to their convicted hearts that serving God and loving God's people was what they were designed to do, yet I was instructed to meet you at your local Waffle House. You ate your bacon and eggs without looking up from your plate as I did my best to authentically and passionately convey to you the work God was doing in my life and the ways God's Spirit was wooing my own toward a life committed to full time ministry.

The few times you did look up, there was no emotion or encouragement or affirmation that I could see in your gaze. It was almost as if you had even forgotten I was there--as though perhaps the clangs and bangs and sizzles of the kitchen had lulled you into believing you were somewhere else you'd rather be.

Where I had entered into this meeting--albeit in a strange setting--hopeful that this would be a positive encounter, I left feeling doubtful, deflated, and even embarrassed. "Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about," I thought to myself as I drove the thirty minutes back to my hometown. If the first step of many toward fulfilling the necessary requirements to follow my call to ministry was this lackluster, this apathetic, this indifferent...what could the others possibly hold in store for me?

Luckily, by the time I got home, the Spirit was no longer wooing mine, but had set fire to it instead. So, when you failed to call and then failed to return my calls in the following weeks, I was empowered by God's Spirit to take matters into my own hands. I am thankful for the pastor of my childhood church home at the time who listened to me and believed in me and got you to come and do what needed to be done for me to officially start the candidacy process.

Afterward, I proceeded to promptly move my membership to another church in a different district that had also helped raise me in the faith. Because I knew I would be taken care of and propelled onward by the "powers that be" in that context.

And so I was. 

Despite the ways that you were so obviously unmoved by my call to ministry, that did not for one breath slow the movement of God's Spirit in my life and my journey toward my vocation.

Yesterday my husband and I were approved by the Board of Ordained Ministry in the Tennessee Conference for ordination as elders in full connection in the United Methodist Church.

I feel very confident you will not read this blog post, and on the off-chance that you do, let me be clear in saying that I harbor no ill will toward you though you broke my heart all those years ago. All is forgiven on my end.

Though you likely will not read it, perhaps another young woman questioning her call to ministry will. Perhaps, she has faced opposition and backlash and disapproval for seeking to faithfully exist in the world as God has created, called, and commissioned her. 

If you are her, hear me when I say: 

Do. Not. Stop. Find the people who have your back and cling to them. Find the people who affirm your gifts and hold fast to them. Find the people who are just as resilient and who believe just as much in your calling as you do (if not more) and never let them go.

Believe that the God who breathed you into being and who still moves and works and speaks into the cosmos (and into your life!) will give you what you need to persevere, to succeed in your desire to be faithful and obedient, and to live out your vocation full of energy and passion that could only be fueled by our Parent God.

So, go girl. Do not stop until you have reached the place where God's Spirit has been wooing you all along and setting your spirit on fire to get there all the while. Know that you are loved and that you have what it takes. Know that you are made for this. Know that God will give you what you need for this. And know that I am always here if you need someone in your corner to remind you in the times that you forget.

To all the men who have affirmed my ministry throughout the years, I give God thanks and praise for each and every one of you. I will attempt to list as many of you as I can think of now. Blessings to you and thank you so, so much for believing in me and even more for interacting with me in such a way that let me know I did not need your seal of approval to be who God was calling me to be. Love to all of you. :

Daddy
Dad (Johnny Myers)
Rev. Bo Myers
Rev. Dick Scott-Welch
Rev. Ed Simmons
Rev. John Wesley Vaughn
Rev. Chris Haynes
Rev. Thad Austin
Rev. Mark Youngman
Rev. David Johnson
Rev. Abe Zimmerman
Rev. Bryan Brooks
Rev. Tommy Ward
Rev. Michael Williams
Rev. Ken Edwards
Rev. Mark Rupp
Rev. Joon Sik Park
Rev. Benjamin Hall
Rev. Brady Whitehead