I made my first hospital visit ever this morning. Yes, ever. It was ugly getting there (read: small town girl trying to navigate downtown-ish Nashville was bound to be a tad dysfunctional. Thank the Lort for GPS!), but in my time visiting Ms Mabel--who I know would appreciate your prayers as she is experiencing shortness of breath and is most likely having a pace maker put in on Thursday--my call to ministry was validated in a way that I didn't expect.

Entering this whole full time ministry extravaganza has been nothing but a whirlwind. No "easing in" to speak of, and in the midst of the going and doing and emailing and meeting folks and planning, I will admit I was getting a little lost in my own thoughts and doubts about whether or not I'm capable of being what people in my congregations (many of them quite a bit older than me) need in a pastor as I finally pulled into a spot in the hospital parking garage.

I walked around for a moment, realized I was lost, and came back to my car. Did I need to park somewhere else? Would my car be towed? I thought this was visitor and patient parking? Then to my surprise and utter gratitude an angel named Tammy appeared. Her daughter, Cassie, just had a baby (They would both also appreciate your prayers!) and it turns out she was headed the direction I needed to go, so she took me under her wing (and into her car! What?! Talk about a trusting human to let a total stranger into your car...) and away we went. She rode up the elevator with me and wished me luck before proceeding to a higher floor--probably Heaven from where she had so obviously come in the first place.

I finally--after making a full lap around the floor--made it to 88 year old Ms Mabel, introduced myself, and watched her watch the nurse take her vitals. They would do this a couple of times over the course of my stay. We then settled into easy conversation, and Mabel talked to me about how her illness had gotten worse in recent years, about her upbringing, being baptized in a river at ten years old, offered heartfelt details about her love for her late husband, children, grandchildren, and great grand children. She went on and on, and as I sat there observing the lines on her face and the still-very-much-apparent twinkle in her eyes while she spoke with me, I thought, "Is this really my "job" right now? I get to listen to this incredible woman's life story and chalk it up as another day in the office (or out of it)?" Our stories are so important for us and for others, and I hope when I left she had a sense of the importance of her life story and witness to me in our time together.

Toward the end of our visit, she apologized for a couple of things--talking "so much" (which I assured her I *loved*) and being worried about her health. "I know I shouldn't worry..." she said as if this somehow diminished her faith. I assured her that God knows we are humans with human emotions because God created us as such and also gently coaxed that God is also understanding and compassionate toward us because God became one of us and experienced some of the very feelings she was experiencing. I told her God didn't love her any less for how she felt and that God was most likely feeling those same emotions alongside her because God loves her so.

I think today I was reminded that I don't have to know all the things or totally get it right 110% of the time. Rather, if I just show up, listen, and love to the very best of my abilities, God will do the rest. People just need to know they matter and know they are loved, especially when they are the most vulnerable. I am so appreciative that I got to learn this lesson from Ms Mabel of all people today for she showed me and taught me much more than she'll ever realize about the importance of presence, kindness, and compassion. I am so lucky to have received all those gifts and more from her today!

So, ministry, huh? Maybe, with the help of God and God's people, just maybe I can do this thing after all.